Wednesday, 8 July 2015

The Benidorm Belle

Her Indoors cleared off to Benidorm last weekend for a few days. Hen party.
How I coped on my own will keep for another day. Since she got back on Sunday night, I’ve had all the gory details, and safe to say I’m certain they’ll come in useful the next time I’m in the doghouse.

Cosying up to a tramp is only the beginning, but it’s bloody annoying. When I go out dressed like a scruff, she tries her damnedest to dissociate herself from me. The pub comedian pulls the same stunt in Benidorm, and he gets a round of applause from her. She even put on his bonnet and bins.

Apparently they all went to see Sticky Vicky and they were not impressed. But it didn’t stop her cuddling some young buck in another bar.

Note: on orders from Her Indoors, this photo has been cropped but it doesn't take a genius to work out was going on. 

I said to her, “You never hold me like that.”
And she replied, “The one time I did, I couldn't get my arm round you.”
Nice to have a supportive wife, isn’t it?
So finally, she’s telling me about this middle aged bloke who approached her in a busy bar and suggested, “How about a fuck for a fiver?”
Naturally, she declined.
“Quite right,” I agreed. “Stick out for a tenner at least.”

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